Updated: Jun 4, 2020
The burden of being “The Explainer”
While we may use this outlet as an opportunity to address current events it’s on my heart to speak on the topics of black mental health, gut health & trauma.
Some feel obligated to offer an explanation to our allies but for all that are weary, burdened, exhausted, suffering from anxiety attacks & reliving childhood trauma-keep in mind, you don’t have to explain anything to anyone. When you find yourself explaining it's critical to understand the intensity formulating inside of you when you're triggered. Allow yourself to release the burden of being “The explainer” & shift it to a forward-focused direction. One may ask, why not both? Feel free but it seems counterproductive.
NO- this does not mean forget about healing.
NO- this does not mean to suppress.
NO- this does not mean to allow it. Nor is the expectation to be heard or understood.
We never signed up to be “The Explainer” to the point of exhaustion when it’s just way too personal.
Our bodies in a triggered state
It's your experience, your well-being, your family, mental health & reality. A reality only you have to return to. Refuse to inherit dysfunction & entertain nonsense. You’re the one that has to report back to a dehumanizing corporate environment & act like a non-triggered, functioning human being every day.
It may feel fine for now but months or weeks in when the “show” is over for them your reality continues. You may feel the effects of the body breaking down.
When our bodies are in a triggered state & we feel powerless- our cortisol levels are shot through the roof. This creates high blood pressure, inflammation, fatigue & impaired brain function. Even worse, a malfunctioning GI tract. Which makes physical pain unbearable & the relationships with everyone around us suffer. This puts us in a frantic state & keeps the gut unhealthy. Our reactions, trauma, and emotions are sometimes more damaging to our gut than poor food choices.
The numbers don’t lie - trust your gut
Why does this matter so much right now?
According to guardian.com Black people have died at a rate of 50.3 per 100,000 people, compared to 20.7 Caucasians, 22.9 for Latinos and 22.7 for Asian Americans.
1.) It's tearing down the immune system we’ve been working extremely hard to boost the last few months.
2.) It makes it almost impossible to attract abundance, opportunities, & the connections we desperately need as a community.
3.) It puts us in a position unable or unwilling (out of fear) to fulfill our individual purpose & obligation. For so many of us, that’s God’s mission. It puts us out of position an unprepared to reap the benefits of every seed sowed throughout our life. I couldn't imagine missing out on that.
4.) Untreated trauma & anxiety will naturally cause anyone without some form of therapy or treatment to numb themselves & disconnect. This seems like a better solution right now but according to researchers & medical doctors & Steven Cole (Professor of Medicine and Psychiatry & Biobehavioral Sciences) & Raphael Kellman, MD (Physician of Integrative & Functional Medicine) the body creates genomics that helps us interact with the world.
The condition of social isolation is enough to transform & destroy pathogens & bacteria, viruses, and fungus. Those same groups of genes that typically work together to fight viruses, control inflammation will become underactive. Although the body may not appear to be ill, the immune system behaves as if it is. Sending out “defensive fire” at an unusually higher level. Being isolated, feeling out of control, and shutting down puts the body in a defensive state.
Again, I invite you to join me on the journey of healing. I'm more concerned about our well-being than being heard or understood. All that want to hear will hear. All in position to be led will follow as we walk this out strategically.
Affirm to yourself: I am safe, I am heard, my life matters, I am taken care of, I’m protected. The next time you're triggered & start explaining while in pain, see if keeping things short & simple lighten the load before going to bed. "It’s personal.”